Kirstie Findlay

Counselling

WHY COUNSELLING AND WHY NOW?

At different times, we all experience periods of stress or crisis and feeling low, and can feel that we are not ourselves, or that things aren’t right.  Even the most resilient person may experience distressing feelings that circumstances are beyond their control, or has the realisation that “I can’t do this on my own".  Perhaps you have attempted discussions with well meaning people which has left you feeling worse - misunderstood, unheard, dismissed or even judged, which can be damaging to the way we feel about ourselves and what we feel is achievable. 

 

Sometimes, the words we tell ourselves such as ”just get on with it” or “I can cope with anything” can eventually leave us feeling less able to cope. Making such demands on ourselves prevents us from acknowledging our vulnerability, taking the time we need, and truly connecting with others to receive support at a time when we could most benefit from it.

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Throughout our lives, we may be inclined to seek the approval of our family, friends, lovers and peers.  We also learn ways to protect ourselves, and sometimes others, from feelings such as sadness, worry, anger and disappointment. We may placate, deny, excuse or ignore. Sometimes, this may be at the expense of our own emotional wellbeing. As time progresses, these learnt behaviours can become so ingrained that we do not question them, and we may not realise that in some regards may be disabling for us.

 

By having conversations with a therapeutic counsellor and perhaps observing the way we relate, those coping behaviours can become more apparent to us and it may become possible to change.

In our initial session together I might ask you what has brought you to this point now. We discuss together what you would like to achieve, and then agree on a number of sessions.